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Dialogue and listening duo
5:26 ص | 
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amera
Dialogue and listening duoIf the talk was of silver, silence is golden .. Just as gold and silver from precious metals, as well as my skills, the dialogue and listening, are the most precious thing that can be enjoyed by the individual in order to achieve successful communication and contact with others. As gold is more precious than silver, the skill of listening is more important than the skill of dialogue.
- First: DialogueThe dialogue key role in resolving problems and difficulties, because the non-disclosure of these negative emotions lead to the aggravation and complexity, due to the fact that human nature is drifting to the custom of speech in a negative reaction, or the so-called method of the dialogue offensive, and this kind of dialogue depends on either the quality of the words used phrases such as the use of blame and accusation, so that his conscience begins (you ...) or (you ...) or on the nature of the sound you speak of them. But when it crosses the human feelings of authentic, it would be more explicit and clear, and he can even say things difficult, but in a way helps the other for listening. When he talks of the couple in a way self (I) is speaking to include the meanings of positive and improve their relationship, a sudden and large, and therefore each of them begins to bear the responsibility to express his feelings, and needs short and without lengthening, and be nice to express themselves, can also be asked what he wants from the other, and all this needs to acquire a special skill in being able to talk about the self, and of course, needs this kind of discourse positive to some effort, if disturbed, for example, is done by the other party, you need to change your position on this matter a bit to express your appreciation to him , or to show some understanding of his position. However, it is difficult for some people, such as acquisition of this skill, and may need a lot of encouragement and patience if they have slow in this matter, this skill is based on three pillars: feelings, needs and desires. Therefore, would listen and talk to solve most of the problems faced by the couple.
- Second: the skill of listeningThe escape from the fact that human hearing is usually a number of ways, including trying to self-defense, or interrupt the other party, or violated, or even what he said was intended to attack rights in other cases to be heard already but that the other party does not feel this matter; because the first party doing some behaviors that can relieve the other party was a joke for example, or trying to change the subject or attempt to reassure some of the phrases: (do not worry about this and try to look for a new one), or (you did not commit any error in this and you will feel comfortable after a few) and the question posed the same rights during all of this is: (Do you feel that the other party has heard the truth of what I want to say?) Studies show that good understanding and accommodating the other would greatly reduce the probability that the dialogue turned to the conflict and controversy.A) ways to listen:1 - how to listen and ensure understanding:It's a way that can strengthen the marital link through the realization of the need for each party that he had listened to him and that he has understood fully by the other. And speak in this way a couple while the other listened, and then tries the listener to reflect or repeat what I said, to make sure that he had heard and understood exactly what he wanted to say partner.2 - Time:When walking, the argument between the wife of the stage to another, and starts out of the limit, it is for a couple to use method (time-out) to reduce the deterioration of the dialogue, and to calm the atmosphere and convert it to a more positive, rather than self-defense and accused the other of any change the subject.3 - How to talk:Seen in the way (listening and understanding to make sure) that one spouse only speak and hear the second, it is not a question, comment or note, or any other form of boycott. The speaker tries to speak only about his feelings and thoughts and not bothering to censure and admonition of another. There is no doubt that it is useful to talk positive and constructive manner, as if speaking for example of what holds the last of respect and love, and much looked forward to reach a compromise that satisfies both parties. The speech makes it easier for the other positive task of listening and understanding. She told one of the wives time and after learning this way: I was standing talking and you are not made available to my husband the opportunity to talk, or even finish his sentence without the boycott him my words, I was not able to silence or five minutes, while I am now greatly benefit from the silence and listening, I have become our conversation and our discussion is much better than it was, and I feel that our relationship is better than the former.4 - the ability to change:The way (listen and make sure of understanding) is not just a way mechanism, but contains in including something of our ability we are changing our attitudes and our habits of speech and dialogue, often in a debate people that one of them instead of listening to the words of the other attentively he thinks always as he has to say is after Scott other; therefore being discussed as if it is said: dialogue of the deaf.
When each side is trying to consider what can be changed in itself, it instead to say (You do not hear me when you talk to you about money and expenses), should say: (The subject of money and expense of the things that I have difficulty in hearing where you, I want to understand the point of do you think of it, and I want that makes you feel also that I listen to you, Can you restore what you have mentioned?) that this kind of dialogue needs to be able to change the feelings and thoughts and reactions, and the ability to one that says to himself: I will try not to be defending myself all the time , and I will try to listen and understand what the other wants to). The acquisition of this ability to change the attitudes and disposition and make it more positive, which would greatly relieve the nerves of the rights and rapprochement between the couple and increase the degree of understanding between them.5 - listen to the real needs:I wonder what the husband says if a wife said: (I feel lonely and bored at times?) The husband says: (It's not my fault) or (I am surprised to say that you feel bored), or (what do you expect me to do? I am throughout the day in practical) can be for a person to understand the nature of such defensive responses, which will not help anything, will not alleviate the feelings of loneliness and boredom when the wife, and definitely Stchaaraa that the pair did not listen to it or did not understand. It was found that of the phrases most useful when an application (make sure to listen with understanding) that the listener says phrases such as: (Can you explain this more so help me to understand?) Or (Do you have something else about this?), These words confirm that is still the chance to talk to the first speaker, and encourages more speech than in himself, so that the listener can feel the emotions of the fact that the speaker tries to express them, no longer stop at mere words. One of the great things in the handling of human rights to feel that the opportunity to express what is in front of himself and that there are those who listen to him.
After talking a party in four or five ideas, bring the second of these ideas heard by the way the mirror to make sure to understand, then open the field for the first party to listen to the interview itself, and the two parties can exchange the opportunity to speak this several times between them, until they both feel that through what was in himself, and that each party had listened to the other. We will see each other at the end of the meeting the nature of the other's needs and feelings, it can then be mentioned and summarized clearly, and often that these needs related to the basic needs of human being such as feelings of acceptance, love and encouragement, or feeling the need for some freedom and choice, or the desire to spend some time in the company of the other party.6 - between the solution and understand the problem:If a person is hit with a stick as he walked in the way it feels very angry, but when he sees that the strike came from the stick of a blind man walking without seeing him, then away his anger; because human feelings change when change the understanding and analysis of the situation. As well as in the case of marital disputes where some could be that melts and fades when the couple to increase understanding of the nature of the problem (make sure to listen with understanding). And some studies have indicated that approximately (70%) of the marital problems do not need to be solved only for a bit of understanding and comprehension. The last thing needed by the human in a situation of discomfort is the presence of ordering him and tell him what he is doing or not doing. It is no longer heard in this situation to the tips and instructions.
It is better when talking and listening room that opens to vent and express their feelings and emotions instead of just searching for solutions. When the husband understands his wife and his understanding is, in turn, is aware of both the nature of the difference between them, and maintains the respect and appreciation for each other despite these differences. Here do not have one that is changing and becoming Kalakr, or to avoid, and not to talk with him, and feel both safe and comfortable in the company of others. Although many of the misunderstandings between people disappear when they talk and listen to each other.
We tend to interpret the concept of what we hear contrary to what is intended by the other party. We hasten this error to reach the wrong conclusions. If the inside you feel a grudge against the people and you are sentenced by a negative, it is possible easily within a few minutes to turn your verdict to this rule is positive. While if you feel a grudge against the people you already make your judgments in the custody of it, whether you're aware of it or were not. But what makes communication actually works is the intention to understand, whatever you think is not good in terms of the Hide happy with this discontent and reveals your reactions, your choice of some words, and the language of body movements, and your eyes and the tone of your voice. The disappointments of the eye shows whether you're aware of it or not not. There are many levels of understanding necessary for the success of communication in relationships, namely:* A deeper understanding of ourselves and others.* Understanding how men and women behave differently under pressure.* A deeper understanding of the true feelings that lie behind what we say and do.* Understand the true feelings hidden behind the actions and reactions of others.* A greater understanding of the fact that the manifestations of things do not reflect a permanent fact of interest to them these things (for example: If your partner shook her shoulders, that may mean something quite different from what it means to you shake your shoulders).* Understand that what may be easy for you request, it may be difficult for someone else.* Understand that what may be easy for you to hear, may be painful for someone else from the people.* Understand that what s number being meaningful to others can not be the case even if this makes sense you have.* Understand that people use language may look just like the language we use, but they are different in essence.* Starts with a proper understanding with the realization that we are all Mtafrdon and DISTINCT from one another, and all too easy to offend all of us understand the other. We can by understanding and respect for our differences to build bridges we have for each other. May wish to be loving, but may try to do your best to be so, but will not be clean unless your love to get rid of discontent. When we are liberated from Indignation becomes friendly available without trouble, and when we try hard to love, it would be a public signal that we are plagued by distaste, and from when we realize that our judgments negative that we issue, whether expressed or hidden raises already a lot of abuse to us, or lead to non-we get no help from the other party, as well as our knowledge of the extent of the impact of hidden distaste to raise others, frees us and makes us more responsible about what we get, we become more able to amnesty and pardon.
- First: DialogueThe dialogue key role in resolving problems and difficulties, because the non-disclosure of these negative emotions lead to the aggravation and complexity, due to the fact that human nature is drifting to the custom of speech in a negative reaction, or the so-called method of the dialogue offensive, and this kind of dialogue depends on either the quality of the words used phrases such as the use of blame and accusation, so that his conscience begins (you ...) or (you ...) or on the nature of the sound you speak of them. But when it crosses the human feelings of authentic, it would be more explicit and clear, and he can even say things difficult, but in a way helps the other for listening. When he talks of the couple in a way self (I) is speaking to include the meanings of positive and improve their relationship, a sudden and large, and therefore each of them begins to bear the responsibility to express his feelings, and needs short and without lengthening, and be nice to express themselves, can also be asked what he wants from the other, and all this needs to acquire a special skill in being able to talk about the self, and of course, needs this kind of discourse positive to some effort, if disturbed, for example, is done by the other party, you need to change your position on this matter a bit to express your appreciation to him , or to show some understanding of his position. However, it is difficult for some people, such as acquisition of this skill, and may need a lot of encouragement and patience if they have slow in this matter, this skill is based on three pillars: feelings, needs and desires. Therefore, would listen and talk to solve most of the problems faced by the couple.
- Second: the skill of listeningThe escape from the fact that human hearing is usually a number of ways, including trying to self-defense, or interrupt the other party, or violated, or even what he said was intended to attack rights in other cases to be heard already but that the other party does not feel this matter; because the first party doing some behaviors that can relieve the other party was a joke for example, or trying to change the subject or attempt to reassure some of the phrases: (do not worry about this and try to look for a new one), or (you did not commit any error in this and you will feel comfortable after a few) and the question posed the same rights during all of this is: (Do you feel that the other party has heard the truth of what I want to say?) Studies show that good understanding and accommodating the other would greatly reduce the probability that the dialogue turned to the conflict and controversy.A) ways to listen:1 - how to listen and ensure understanding:It's a way that can strengthen the marital link through the realization of the need for each party that he had listened to him and that he has understood fully by the other. And speak in this way a couple while the other listened, and then tries the listener to reflect or repeat what I said, to make sure that he had heard and understood exactly what he wanted to say partner.2 - Time:When walking, the argument between the wife of the stage to another, and starts out of the limit, it is for a couple to use method (time-out) to reduce the deterioration of the dialogue, and to calm the atmosphere and convert it to a more positive, rather than self-defense and accused the other of any change the subject.3 - How to talk:Seen in the way (listening and understanding to make sure) that one spouse only speak and hear the second, it is not a question, comment or note, or any other form of boycott. The speaker tries to speak only about his feelings and thoughts and not bothering to censure and admonition of another. There is no doubt that it is useful to talk positive and constructive manner, as if speaking for example of what holds the last of respect and love, and much looked forward to reach a compromise that satisfies both parties. The speech makes it easier for the other positive task of listening and understanding. She told one of the wives time and after learning this way: I was standing talking and you are not made available to my husband the opportunity to talk, or even finish his sentence without the boycott him my words, I was not able to silence or five minutes, while I am now greatly benefit from the silence and listening, I have become our conversation and our discussion is much better than it was, and I feel that our relationship is better than the former.4 - the ability to change:The way (listen and make sure of understanding) is not just a way mechanism, but contains in including something of our ability we are changing our attitudes and our habits of speech and dialogue, often in a debate people that one of them instead of listening to the words of the other attentively he thinks always as he has to say is after Scott other; therefore being discussed as if it is said: dialogue of the deaf.
When each side is trying to consider what can be changed in itself, it instead to say (You do not hear me when you talk to you about money and expenses), should say: (The subject of money and expense of the things that I have difficulty in hearing where you, I want to understand the point of do you think of it, and I want that makes you feel also that I listen to you, Can you restore what you have mentioned?) that this kind of dialogue needs to be able to change the feelings and thoughts and reactions, and the ability to one that says to himself: I will try not to be defending myself all the time , and I will try to listen and understand what the other wants to). The acquisition of this ability to change the attitudes and disposition and make it more positive, which would greatly relieve the nerves of the rights and rapprochement between the couple and increase the degree of understanding between them.5 - listen to the real needs:I wonder what the husband says if a wife said: (I feel lonely and bored at times?) The husband says: (It's not my fault) or (I am surprised to say that you feel bored), or (what do you expect me to do? I am throughout the day in practical) can be for a person to understand the nature of such defensive responses, which will not help anything, will not alleviate the feelings of loneliness and boredom when the wife, and definitely Stchaaraa that the pair did not listen to it or did not understand. It was found that of the phrases most useful when an application (make sure to listen with understanding) that the listener says phrases such as: (Can you explain this more so help me to understand?) Or (Do you have something else about this?), These words confirm that is still the chance to talk to the first speaker, and encourages more speech than in himself, so that the listener can feel the emotions of the fact that the speaker tries to express them, no longer stop at mere words. One of the great things in the handling of human rights to feel that the opportunity to express what is in front of himself and that there are those who listen to him.
After talking a party in four or five ideas, bring the second of these ideas heard by the way the mirror to make sure to understand, then open the field for the first party to listen to the interview itself, and the two parties can exchange the opportunity to speak this several times between them, until they both feel that through what was in himself, and that each party had listened to the other. We will see each other at the end of the meeting the nature of the other's needs and feelings, it can then be mentioned and summarized clearly, and often that these needs related to the basic needs of human being such as feelings of acceptance, love and encouragement, or feeling the need for some freedom and choice, or the desire to spend some time in the company of the other party.6 - between the solution and understand the problem:If a person is hit with a stick as he walked in the way it feels very angry, but when he sees that the strike came from the stick of a blind man walking without seeing him, then away his anger; because human feelings change when change the understanding and analysis of the situation. As well as in the case of marital disputes where some could be that melts and fades when the couple to increase understanding of the nature of the problem (make sure to listen with understanding). And some studies have indicated that approximately (70%) of the marital problems do not need to be solved only for a bit of understanding and comprehension. The last thing needed by the human in a situation of discomfort is the presence of ordering him and tell him what he is doing or not doing. It is no longer heard in this situation to the tips and instructions.
It is better when talking and listening room that opens to vent and express their feelings and emotions instead of just searching for solutions. When the husband understands his wife and his understanding is, in turn, is aware of both the nature of the difference between them, and maintains the respect and appreciation for each other despite these differences. Here do not have one that is changing and becoming Kalakr, or to avoid, and not to talk with him, and feel both safe and comfortable in the company of others. Although many of the misunderstandings between people disappear when they talk and listen to each other.
We tend to interpret the concept of what we hear contrary to what is intended by the other party. We hasten this error to reach the wrong conclusions. If the inside you feel a grudge against the people and you are sentenced by a negative, it is possible easily within a few minutes to turn your verdict to this rule is positive. While if you feel a grudge against the people you already make your judgments in the custody of it, whether you're aware of it or were not. But what makes communication actually works is the intention to understand, whatever you think is not good in terms of the Hide happy with this discontent and reveals your reactions, your choice of some words, and the language of body movements, and your eyes and the tone of your voice. The disappointments of the eye shows whether you're aware of it or not not. There are many levels of understanding necessary for the success of communication in relationships, namely:* A deeper understanding of ourselves and others.* Understanding how men and women behave differently under pressure.* A deeper understanding of the true feelings that lie behind what we say and do.* Understand the true feelings hidden behind the actions and reactions of others.* A greater understanding of the fact that the manifestations of things do not reflect a permanent fact of interest to them these things (for example: If your partner shook her shoulders, that may mean something quite different from what it means to you shake your shoulders).* Understand that what may be easy for you request, it may be difficult for someone else.* Understand that what may be easy for you to hear, may be painful for someone else from the people.* Understand that what s number being meaningful to others can not be the case even if this makes sense you have.* Understand that people use language may look just like the language we use, but they are different in essence.* Starts with a proper understanding with the realization that we are all Mtafrdon and DISTINCT from one another, and all too easy to offend all of us understand the other. We can by understanding and respect for our differences to build bridges we have for each other. May wish to be loving, but may try to do your best to be so, but will not be clean unless your love to get rid of discontent. When we are liberated from Indignation becomes friendly available without trouble, and when we try hard to love, it would be a public signal that we are plagued by distaste, and from when we realize that our judgments negative that we issue, whether expressed or hidden raises already a lot of abuse to us, or lead to non-we get no help from the other party, as well as our knowledge of the extent of the impact of hidden distaste to raise others, frees us and makes us more responsible about what we get, we become more able to amnesty and pardon.
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